Reminiscing

I miss these girls.






That's about it for tonight.

Word of the Day

I haven't decided if this is a going to become a daily thing. It might, simply because I like words rather a lot. Like...I read the dictionary when I was a sophomore in high school. I think that's a little late in the game for the reading-the-dictionary-is-cute phase of life, but I can't change the facts.


Here's an example. My binder for sophomore English was a bright lime green. For some reason I still remember that. The school library had a massive dictionary, and I thought it was cool, so I made it my goal to find one fantastic word that I didn't know starting with each letter of the alphabet.


Aposiopesis. n. def.: a sudden breaking
off in the midst of a sentence, as if from
inability or unwillingness to proceed.

Braw. adj. def.: fine or fine looking; excellent.


You get the point.


In any case...


I found a cool word today:

Schiamachy. n. def.: the practice of fighting an imaginary opponent.


I like it. I may keep this up.

I hope this isn't vain...

BUT


I'm a little proud right now, and I wanted to say this somewhere.


I got a 4.0 GPA this semester.


Yay.

Reflection

Graduation has a funny way of making you feel oddly sentimental at strange times. Particularly when you're exhausted due to the fact that you're trying so hard to hold on to all the moments that would be lost if you actually went to sleep. It's happy, to be sure - I mean, why wouldn't you celebrate completing four years of hard work? (Yes, I realize that "hard" is a very relative term. I fully expect further schooling to be increasingly difficult.)

But somewhere, deep down, there's a very real sorrow that goes along with it. Something continually crying, Don't let this be the end...please...I don't know what comes next. I don't want to let this time go yet. I'm not ready. I don't want to separate from the dear friends that have become as tightly knit as a little family.

It's weird; it's a goal you work toward for more than 16 years of your life. And all of a sudden, it's all over. You don't have the familiarity of academia to look forward to after a three-month break. It's not scary; we serve a God bigger than uncertainty. But it is heart-wrenching, and leads to occasional unexpected tears.

I'm so thankful for the time I've spent here. I'm thankful for the learning, for the music, for the life lessons, for the joys and the sadness, for shared experiences, for the accomplishments and the failures, and most of all for the relationships. I couldn't have asked for a better college experience, and I have the most wonderful friends I could possibly imagine.


"I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus...And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and my be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of God."

LA FIN.

WHOOOOOOA Blogger died yesterday. Not cool. Mostly because it took with it all the most recent posts from all the blogs I read via Google Reader (that thing is the bomb, you know...) and has been slowly replacing them all day today. Thus, every time I check Google Reader - a pretty frequent occurrence - I am misled to believe that I have a whole bunch of new things to read, and really, I have none. How am I supposed to keep up on the blogging world?!?

[Overreacting a bit there, don't you think? Oh well. Life must go on.]

So I'm done with student teaching now. Done DONE DONE! The elementary kids are so cute. One girl gave me a super cool homemade card and hugged me a total of four times.


The rest of them signed a big card, and a lot of them wrote funny things...



(Names have been removed to preserve anonymity. You know. Because the school might come and assassinate me.)

I felt so loved.

After school, I went to the mall with The Apartmentmates to celebrate and get some new summer clothes. I decided that having had all my current clothes for several years, it's probably time to update and upgrade the wardrobe. I got a skirt, a hat, a shirt, a dress, and a necklace or two.


Here is my shameless plug for my new favorite store. I used to think that Forever 21 was totally overwhelming, but I recently discovered that it's more like a slightly-more-organized T.J. Maxx or Marshalls or something. In short, if you have the time to go digging, you'll probably end up in the dressing room with a few rounds ("No more than six, PLEASE!") of articles of clothing to try on. As stated above: new. favorite. store. Moral: go shop there, and if you're willing to sift, it'll be well worth the time, provided you want vintage-y clothes.

Now I'm sitting here on my bed with my bowl of dip and a bag of carrots...


...feeling (almost) awfully footloose and fancy free, wearing a lacy dress, and blogging in between bouts of playing(?) clarinet...


...amidst the disaster zone that I currently call my room.


By this time next week, it'll all have to be packed up. But for right now, I'm going to enjoy the freedom of no more paperwork while I block out the fact that I'm going to miss those little buggers.

Paperwork!

I finished my secondary evidence binder today. My cooperating teacher decided to take a picture.

Recital Completion FOREVER!

Our apartment has gone through the recital process several times this year. It started with Diana's junior recital first semester. (Yes, it was during our senior year. Long, unnecessary story.)


Then was my senior recital.


After that was Meghanne's senior recital.


But today, we ran out of apartment recitals. Diana performed her senior recital, marking the last time any one of the the apartment members has to perform a required recital before we graduate.

As it turns out, singing lends itself to excellent facial expressions. Diana's are, of course, entirely realistic. Ours? Simply dramatic.

Face number 1:






Face number 2:






Face number 3:






Finally, in honor of singers everywhere, Meghanne, Michelle, Lauren, and I decided to show our most intense singing expressions of all time:





Wonderful, wonderful job, Diana! We love you!

A Riddle

I've had the lyrics for a rather clever riddle song bouncing around my head for the past several days. Thank you, elementary school. Can YOU figure out what it's talking about?


As I was walking in a field of wheat,

I picked up something good to eat.

Neither fish, flesh, fowl, nor bone,

I kept it till it ran alone.

What?

Hey world. Snow in April is just not cool.*


Or maybe it is cool, because it COULD lead to snow day number six and would allow me to successfully avoid a full day of elementary school BY MY-FREAKIN'-SELF.**


I'm not counting on it though. That would just be too darn exciting.







*Logically, I guess a temperature of 32 degrees does qualify as "cool." A thousand pardons to those scientifically-minded people out there.

**I don't mean to complain. It's just that I've never had full authority over a class of real students without a music teacher present. This frightens me.

The Joys of Public School, part 2

I've decided I need to add to my list of things learned while student teaching. Here goes.

1. How to park diagonally backwards.


I wouldn't say I'm an expert at this - YET - but I've gotten significantly better. My wheels are now mostly parallel with the white lines!

2. How to stay awake while observing private lessons.


(Note: this is NOT me - shocking, I know - nor is it during a flute lesson. It's just a funny picture.)

Tips to those who also need this skill: write a letter to someone in outline form so it looks like you're taking notes; get an instrument and play along, even though the 5th graders are significantly better than you; drink water when you find yourself struggling to keep your eyelids from melting; tell your teacher that everything you learn during the day is absorbed while you're asleep and that you're just attempting to hasten the process.

3. As previously mentioned, how to write a letter in outline form.


If you're awesome, you'll write it in cursive just for the practice of improving your handwriting.

4. How to remain oblivious and invisible while overhearing things in the teachers' lounge.


(I take no credit for this cartoon. I hope it's legal to post it here.)

Because I can achieve this state of being, I feel it is not necessary to say anything about it. I might no longer be both oblivious and invisible.

5. How to get small children to think you're cool.



-Fix their instruments when they break them. It's inevitable.
-Sing for them...on pitch. They'll tell you to go on American Idol, regardless of the fact that you are not a voice major, nor should you be.
-Learn all their names in a class period; they'll think you know EVERYTHING.
-Don't talk to them like you're a million years older than them.
-French braid your hair without a mirror.

6. How to explain things a thousand different ways.



Sometimes you need to get your point across to different learning styles, so you have to say the same thing using different words. Or you need to teach something clearly to a wide variety of students, so you explain things using other vocabulary. Or you must synthesize your main points into a cohesive statement that appeals to everyone, because of Howard Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences. Or, to put it metaphorically, it's like reharmonizing your chord progression, but every time you come back to the tonic. Got the point yet?

7. How to get ready in the morning really fast.


(I think I need this alarm clock. Getting up would be so much more fun!)

I like to maximize the amount of sleep that I get to the point where I get up at the last possible moment that I can get up and still be on time. Let's just say my alarm goes off at 5:45, and I don't get up until 6:25...and I need to leave at 6:40. Ish.

I could probably keep going, but I think I should stop here, because maximizing the amount of sleep I get should probably include going to bed really early. If I'm going to do that, I need to start getting ready now. Go.

What's that?

The word "vacation" appears to have vacated its position in my mental dictionary. This is a small portion of what I have to do over my "break" next week.

-Get my license renewed. This requires driving to Vermont for a day and a half.
-Have a lesson or two.
-Go to a bunch of rehearsals.
-Take my most important audition.
-Catch up on any paperwork that I didn't fill out last week.
-Create an evidence binder and a portfolio.
-Practice.
-See some friends that I haven't seen for most of the semester.
-Turn 22.

There's a lot more than that, but it seems that brain function as a whole (along with vocabulary) has vacated the premises. Not gonna lie...right now I just want to curl up under my down comforter with my pajama-hoodie on with the hood pulled over my head and sleep for a million years. It's not possible, but that's what I want to do. It will not be possible over next week's "vacation." It will not be possible when vacation ends, because I'll have to go back to school. It will not be possible on weekends, because MENC stuff happens then.

I'm so tired.

Oh no...

I just discovered that the school at which I student teach has a secret supply of free chocolate. This is bad.

Student Teaching Misconceptions

Gordon says....

-You won't have time to practice. Give up now.
-You can't take lessons.
-You shouldn't be in any ensembles.
-You will have lots of night rehearsals.
-You will feel absolutely disconnected from people on campus.
-You're going to change so much that you'll be fantastically grown-up by the end.
-Public school education should be all-consuming.


I say....

-I've had more time to practice this semester than I have in any other semester, no contest.
-I am taking lessons, even if it isn't on my transcript.
-I'm in both Wind Ensemble and Orchestra, and I'm playing for a pit outside of Gordon.
-I have no night rehearsals, except on Monday, and it's not related to school.
-My apartment it awesome (no disconnect here), and I've managed to stay in touch with people at school.
-I still feel pretty normal, and I've been doing this for a month.
-Public school education makes up approximately 40% of my day. 60% is not public school education.

Does this mean that I'm slacking off?

Dear weather,

COME ON, SNOW STORM! YOU CAN DO IT! I BELIEVE IN YOUR CAPABILITY TO CANCEL SCHOOL!

Love,
Jillian


Post Script: Thank you. I am glad you have heard my request and responded favorably.

Jillian's current status of existence:

-Done with day 1 of student teaching
-Exhausted, and thus going to bed
-No longer hungry, thanks to the sacred triumvirate: bacon, egg, and cheese
-Finished with homework
-Prepared (?) for tomorrow

I'd say that's decent after a 12-hour day.

Applications of Doom, Chapter 423,987,268,522: In Which I Rejoice Greatly

I'M DONE I'M DONE I'M DONE!!!!!!!!! With ALL of them! Now I just have to schedule one more audition and figure out how I'm going to work the two auditions scheduled on the same day, but all the thinking stuff is done. HOORAY! And I finished them all before the end of the year. Happy 2011, world!

Applications of Doom, Chapter 423,987,268,521: YUCK

I hate, hate, hate writing resumes. Is it ok if I just submit my already-created artistic resume in place of a legit one? For everything I ever apply for? Life would be so much easier. Thanks, application deities.

Oops

Confession: finals week led me to break both of my unbreakable fashion rules:

1. Never, never, never wear leggings as pants.

2. At all costs, avoid looking ridiculous.

Arguably, this outfit was worn only as pajamas, and it was very comfortable, but I'm documenting it here to atone for the error of my ways in the form pictorial humiliation.

'Tis the season of stress, I've decided. I'm making a list. I'm not checking it twice, because I don't want to read it any more than I have to. So here goes:

-Finals - those terrible cumulative monstrous tests that take precedence over everything else, even if everything else is, in the long run, more pertinent to your life

-Millions of rehearsals/concerts - they take up hours and hours of time, and you play the same music over and over again

-Papers - they just take forever, and no one actually wants to read them anyway

-Crazy scheduling - when you look at your planner and realize there's no time to do all the homework that's due

-Nasty weather - when you leave for class, realizing that it's a lot colder outside than you anticipated and you have to go all the way across campus

-Materialism - inflatable snowmen? Really?!?

-Sleeplessness - when you consider yourself lucky to go to bed before 2, and you become easily annoyed at the smallest things because your overtired

-Interruptions - when you just want to get your work done, but you realize that there are more demands on your time than just work


This list is too stress-inducing to continue. Furthermore, being the (generally) optimistic person that I am, I believe in alternative viewpoints.

-Productivity - when you look at your massive list of stuff to do, and realize that you can check a lot of it off. Who doesn't like checking things off lists?

-Millions of rehearsals/concerts - it doesn't happen often that you get to play glorious church music with a full orchestra and dear friends. You might as well enjoy it while it lasts, and you get to worship to boot! Score!

-Crazy scheduling - you feel pretty heroic by the end of the day when you realize that you conquered another one.

-Nasty weather - it may be cold, but you can't wear your winter clothes in the summer. Or you can curl up next to your heater with a mug of tea and a cookie while reading your English homework. Plus you get to wear nice coats.

-Decorations - I've never met anyone that didn't appreciate holiday decorations, regardless of relative tackiness or class. It's an outlet for expressing creativity.

-Restoration - "He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul." It's such a holy time - a time for giving, for forgiving, for repairing, for praying, and for new beginnings. Time to focus on selfless blessing rather than selfish gain.

-Interruptions - when a friendly hello turns into a discussion of theology, and you get a brief reminder that everyone you see on the street is a child of God, holy and dearly loved.

What do we have to complain about?

Veni, vidi, vici

That's right, grad school application number one! I CAME, I SAW, AND I CONQUERED! Ok, so maybe that's a little over-joyous since I still have 66% of them left to do, but it feels quite nice to have one checked off the list. Also, most of the work I did on it was concentrated into the last two and a half hours, so if I can do that again for the other two, it won't be so bad at all. However, it left my bed looking a little like a war zone.


...and you can't see the floor. It was absolutely covered in paper that I deemed now worthless and therefore recyclable. Whilst digging through all this paper/music, I discovered that I do not, in fact, play oboe. Instead, I play the hoboe. Who knew?


A welcome interruption came in the form of...well...they say pictures are worth a thousand words...


Ha.

And, of course, as life gets more busy (stressier?), my corner gets messier.


Once I finished, I made some celebratory oatmeal (steel cut oats, of course) with maple syrup, cinnamon, and nutmeg, and called it a night. All in all, minus the power outage that knocked out everything from Wenham to Salem, it was a very productive evening.